What makes an ideal Eurovision spokesperson?

The Voting Procedure of the Eurovision Song Contest is undoubtedly one of the most exciting parts of the show, as all the participating countries announce their points causing the scoreboard to shift and shuffle in a veritable battle for song supremacy. Of course, the douze points are in the starring role during the Voting Procedure, but many forget about the supporting roles played out by the spokespersons. I think alot of broadcasters have overlooked the spokesperson and this is a pity, as I feel that they are a potentially entertaining facet of the show that is currently untapped. So how can we make the spokespersons share the spotlight with the douze points? Here are my thoughts:

1) Charisma & Likability: As the spokesperson, you are not only a television personality but also a representative of the country. Therefore, you need to be charismatic and just shine across the TV screen. If you’re an utter bore, then the whole proceeding becomes tiresome. Remember the Polish spokesperson from a few years ago? I used to dread Poland’s turn to vote. But if you’re upbeat & fun, then the loooong affair that is the Voting Procedure suddenly becomes even more fun to watch.  The best example is Bosnia & Herzegovina’s spokesperson in 2003. Even though she bungled it up completely, her charm and wit saw her through and turned a horrifyingly embarrassing situation into a light-heartened bit of fun. See what happened below:

2) Funny Factor: It also would be great if we can get in a bit of a laughter during the Voting Procedure to take the edge off of the nervousness in supporting our favourite entries. And for that, what better way to get our giggles than from a comedic spokesperson? It’s a wonderful way to break up what could become a monotonous practice. Over the years, we’ve had some funny spokespersons but I’m sure I’m not alone when I say that, out of all of them, perhaps the most funniest is Peter Poles from Slovenia! The man’s hilarious and a great personality. I want Slovenia to win just so that Peter can host Eurovision the following year. How cool would that be? Here are some of Peter’s best moments when announcing Slovenia’s points.

3) Correct Elocution & Grammar: Call me a perfectionist or call me crazy, but if you are going to present the votes in English, then enunciate the words and make it sound like English! We’ve seen so many spokespersons speaking in either broken English or such strong accents that I can barely tell its English at all. Or better yet, in French. It’s always a head trip when a country announces its points in French when it doesn’t traditionally speak it. Like Albania in 2005, or Turkey in 2002. Fun times.

4) Good Looks: And if worse comes to worst and you can’t find a spokesperson who fulfills any of the above criteria, the very least you can do is give the viewers something pretty to look at. We’ve seen from smoking hot spokespersons over the years that make us all think that everyone from those countries must be as good-looking. And what better way to improve your country’s reputation than being perceived to be full of attractive people? And here are a few of the spokespersons that have fogged up our TV screens in recent years.

Left to Right: Eric Saade (Sweden 2010), Marysya Horobets (Ukraine 2009), Jason Danino-Holt (Israel 2007), Sonia Ferrer (Spain 2006), Aleksandra Rosiak (Poland 2010)

And to round things off, here are some the funniest moments during the voting at Eurovision over the years:

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